OMG, I lost my identity!

Okay, so not to blabber on and on about it or get too personal sharing out the more intimate details of my life,   I decided to share this bit because it was so much on the subject of how changing the way you view something can change everything.  A dear friend and Yoga Teacher Fred Miller used to say after the om, “Now, prepare to leave the real world and go back out into the world of illusion.”  Yesterday was about seeing differently from the same place: how your point of view changes the way you see things.  This morning I woke up in a panic from a dream where I was traveling and all the contents of my backpack disappeared; id, money etc.  In fact, I tried in that half wake state to change the end of the dream.  When I related it to my husband Ed, he said, “Means you don’t need any of that old stuff.”  That perspective changed everything!

I did this little image. Asmita is as we know the ego identifying itself as something separate and apart . We rely on our sense perceptions and create an identity that ceases to seem an illusion , but rather our reality.  I’ve written in the past about the “I am” without an adjective or noun.  Sometimes in our journey there comes a moment when we feel we have lost or fear losing all that we identify as self or important to self.  At that point it’s no joking matter. but rather can be a dark night of the soul.  But like every dream state, we awaken to a new light and often what seemed the worst possible scene can turn out to be a turning point that we can look back upon with gratitude, and even a smile at how attached we were to who we think we are.  It’s hard work getting to the soul of the matter but if we do it with a sense of humor, the light in our heart will continue to guide us to a place of being which is often quite different from who we thought we were or even wanted to be.  In Sanskrit,”Neti neti, not this not that.” In meditation the breath whispers, “So hum … I am….”My first meditation teacher Will Hoff used to remind us, “Just be, just be, just be.”

So, just for today I celebrate the “OMG I lost my identity” dream and wonder what’s next on the horizon or on the stage I call my life.  I’d love to hear about you on the road to ‘be yoga now’ or whatever path you’re walking.

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